Scary Things...

So I'm scared of a few things....some of them are just plain weird...Here they are(by no means, in order):

-The Ocean. I am so scared of it. I really enjoy being scared of the ocean is what's weird, though. It's just so....vast..so powerful and it makes me feel tiny and helpless. I can stare it and sob while I'm smiling and I'm shaking for fear of it with my eyes wide.(I pray I will be like this more in terms to God) Also tsunamis have something to do with my fear of the ocean. Every time I am at the beach I think of that song by Leeann Womack, "I Hope You Dance". It is one of my favorite songs ever.

-Space...see above..it's kinda the same.

Storms...see space it's kinda the same, but way less dramatic.

-Not being able to smile. Yep...for real. Like when I'm crying over something the idea will strike me that perhaps I am so sad and upset that my mind will not permit my mouth to smile...so I run to the bathroom and smile amid my tears...I even try laughing just to be on the safe side.

-heights


-Brown eyes. It depends on the brown eye, actually(to you Shaws and Beyers and Coxs they are defined as "Selkie"). Not all brown eyes make me scared. The dark, melt-y ,bore-holes-in your-soul kinda unapproachable, eyes. The ones that stare. Now the weird thing is that brown eyes are also my favorite, but nonetheless...they are scary...I guess in a good way, but really it's sorta odd.

-The end of the world. My dad likes to talk about prophesies being fulfilled from the Bible and wars and us escaping and having to survive. Well, I don't. Not in the slightest. Of course I know that we who are Christians are not destined for wrath and that God is sovereign. I know I should be sooo excited to see this stuff happen in our world, but really it just kinda creeps me out. It does excite me yes, but I get really scared.  Then I start thinking about Ian and Amelia who have not been saved by God yet...or at least no profession has been made.  If we get raptured they are going to be here on Earth alone...Again, God will do what he wants with them, but I love them and want our family to always be together.

-People...a combination of sooooo many things..I won't even explain it. I do love to be alone, but on the other hand...another fear is:

-Being lonely. I need people...it's all a circle. It's better to be alone, but know that there are people to talk to if you need it. 

-God. This of course is a a good type of fear. I know He loves me and I trust Him to do whatever He wants with me and my life..but of course...HE IS GOD....I don't even know what that phrase means is so big. It scares me. It scares me that I won't ever completely get that phrase. It scares me that I dare utter the phrase without comprehending it. It scares me how flippant I am with it. It scares me that my brain is so limited.  Everything about God scares me...but just because I am in the flesh and I can't be what I should be. It also scares me that I do not feel scared writing any of this.  But with being scared or rather, having a fear of God comes a great comfort and overwhelming thankfulness that I do not have to be scared! I can approach God boldly and offer up my heart daily.

The picture is of our family about 4 years ago...I think we were at San Louis something or other...not really sure actually.  So, these are only a few things that scare me.  The others will come with a different post. What scares you?